Understanding Self-Harm

What It Is, Why It Happens and How to Support Healing

Self-harm—also known as non-suicidal self-injury (NSSI)—is when a person intentionally hurts themselves as a way to cope with overwhelming emotional pain, stress, or mental health struggles. While self-harm is not typically a suicide attempt, it is a serious sign that someone is in emotional distress and needs support.

What Is Self-Harm?

Self-harm can take many forms, including:

  • Cutting or scratching the skin

  • Burning

  • Hitting or punching oneself

  • Pulling out hair

  • Picking at wounds to prevent healing. These actions are often used as a coping mechanism to express emotional pain, release tension or regain a sense of control when emotions feel unmanageable.

Why Do People Self-Harm?

Self-harm is a complex behavior with no single cause. It’s often linked to underlying mental health conditions, emotional trauma, or overwhelming stress. Some common contributing factors include:

  • Depression or anxiety

  • Low self-esteem or self-hatred

  • Bullying, abuse or trauma

  • Difficulty expressing emotions

  • Feeling emotionally numb or disconnected

  • Peer pressure or social influence (especially among teens)

While it may bring temporary relief, self-harm does not resolve the underlying issue—and over time, it can lead to greater emotional distress and physical risk.

Warning Signs of Self-Harm

Recognizing the signs is the first step toward helping someone in need. Look for:

  • Unexplained cuts, bruises, burns or scars

  • Wearing long sleeves or pants even in warm weather

  • Isolation or withdrawal from friends and family

  • Emotional instability, mood swings or frequent sadness

  • Possession of sharp objects or tools without clear reason

  • Expressing feelings of hopelessness or self-loathing

If you notice any of these signs in someone you care about, don’t ignore them—reach out with empathy and support.

How to Help Someone Who is Self-Harming

If someone confides in you—or if you suspect they may be self-harming—here are some ways to offer support:

Stay calm and listen without judgment. Create a safe space for them to talk.


Don’t focus only on the behavior. Ask what’s behind the pain.


Encourage them to seek professional help. Therapists can help develop healthier coping strategies.


Reassure them they are not alone. Remind them that help is available and that they are cared for.